I was engulfed in a state of paranoia I cannot put into words. I became the living definition of the word. I was certain if you procured a dictionary and dug through it, my sad and sorry little face would be directly adjacent to delirious. I found myself abusing caffeine and trying any and all methods I could grasp to force myself to sleep very little. When I did sleep, I was practically lying on top of Zias, terrified to be out of his arms for more than a second. I found myself starting to drift off in dangerous places like while driving and showering. The dark circles under my eyes had taken up permanent residence and I felt myself losing control. I frequently felt weak and became quite forgetful. I dumped the coffee grounds out and replaced them with more, but this time I used darker ones with an aroma so st...

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