Where did my waist go?
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Pregnancy is rubbish, it makes your body going to hell. It makes you hate things that normal people enjoy. Like tuna and steak.

I thought my body was my friend. We used to do terrific things together like touch our toes and be able to smell things without throwing up on the toes we used to touch. We used to really enjoy sleeping without having to pee every 20 minutes. We used to enjoy smelling things with a normal human nose, not with the nose of a super smelling super hero. We used to go tra-la-la through the daisies.

When you are pregnant your body, once your friend, will completely abandon you and move on to what it thinks is far more important things, just when you needed it most. You will be a soul trapped in enemy territory and you will be fighting a metaphysical war you cannot win....

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