With Valentine's Day rapidly approaching, I felt it necessary to write a post about the trials and tribulations of one of life's greatest and most painful experiences:

Trying to find a Valentine's Day gift.

[DISCLAIMER: the preceding installment is from my book, "Romantic as Hell," available on Amazon]

THE QUEST

A small boy wanders out onto the stage in front of a shuffling, but somewhat quiet, audience. He stops dead center of the platform and looks blankly into a sea of people who are mostly still looking down into their laps because they’re playing Candy Crush on their iPhones.  

In their defense, it’s pretty addicting even though Level 65 is a real bitch. 
The boy stands, nonplussed,...

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