It appears to be nothing more than hunks of fur and meat collected into squishy piles. Since it would be suicide to walk in there without it, I reluctantly smear the rotten goo over every inch of exposed skin. Having an enhanced sense of smell certainly isn’t helping the situation. A few dry heaves later, and I’m completely covered in chunky bat poo.

With the new suit of putrid armor in place, I’m free to search the gnarly teeth for the best way into the dark cave. Sadly, they reveal absolutely nothing about what’s hiding inside. The bright mid-day sun makes it impossible to see anything beyond the black hole. By the looks of it, I’ll be going in blind. Maybe it’s best I don’t know what’s hiding in there??? Ha! Not even I can sell that load of crap to my...

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