Back in 1998, I was a waitress at Planet Hollywood in San Francisco. The restaurant chain was still enjoying quite a bit of fanfare back then, and there were often 'celebrity events' happening in the dining room. To be chosen to work one of these events was considered a privilege by the majority of the staff, but I mostly found them to be a gigantic pain in the ass.

Those things were always such a hassle, a whole lot of tremendous extra effort just to deliver assembly line hamburgers to the teaming masses. It meant having to dodge screaming girls and bouncing boys while carrying a tray full of food, trying not to drop the shit everywhere when camera flashes exploded in my peripheral vision, trying to maintain a smile while the horde clamored and fed.

Generally, I tried to avoid these speci...

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