I don’t know whose life I think I’m trying to lead, but it certainly has almost nothing to do with the one I have. Somehow, some way—I honestly don’t even know how—I’ve managed to go to Los Angeles, New Orleans, and Boston already this year. I’m going to New York in October for the NYC Comic Con. I’m now going to Punta Cana in December to drink a lot, and then I have to go back to New York for Christmas. Plus, I need to come up with another $300 by August 1st to pay for a conference I pinky swore I’d attend next February in San Antonio.

As of right now there is $18.73 in my bank account.

And I’m supposed to fund this all by working three days a week at a local burger joint— a feat which I’ve managed to do pretty successfully so...

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