It’s a rude awakening now that I realize I’ve lived almost half a century.

I’ve lost count of how many milestones, achievements, successes, and failures I’ve had in that lifetime; many happy times, and conversely, many sorrows and heartbreaks.

When I was a kid, I couldn’t wait until I was old enough to drive. To have my own car. To vote. To drink (legally). To be able to go anywhere I wanted, at any time, without asking for permission. The anticipation of living on my own, earning a degree, getting a good-paying job, buying a home, and having a family.

But, when I hit 40, my perception changed drastically. Some of it was by choice, other was due to sheer reality. All the big milestones had long passed me by. What did I have to look forward to now? Social Security? AARP? Old age? Senior discounts? Blue plate specials? Priority airline boarding?

Like the flick of a light switch, all hell broke loose upon entering the fourth decade of my life. My body began breaking down. Like a product of planned obsolescence, when the clock turned 40, my demise began. I had already scaled the so-called hill and made it to the summit. I was at the top, and now the only direction was down.

I began thinking about my own mortality. I filed my living will and made my final wishes known. I purchased whole life insurance. I’ve initiated awkward conversations with my parents about what their own wishes are as they enter their twilight years. Where important documents and bank accounts are located, in case something should happen to them.

These are activities I never even thought about before turning 40, never mind imagined doing. But I suppose these things could be categorized as “milestones” too. Things that you think about and handle when you are middle-aged. Having to be proactive and responsible for property and bills which will be inherited by my beneficiaries when I have gone gently into that good night.

In this series, I will capture the joys and sorrows that I’ve encountered during my fourth decade of life. While each tale will be told from my female perspective, this series might be educational and humorous for male readers, as well as for those who have yet to hit this milestone. I’m hoping these tales generate a new perspective and respect for the strength that it takes to be a woman, in particular, a middle-aged one.

Enjoy!