“Difficulties are meant to rouse, not discourage. The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict.”

– William Ellery Channing, writer and Unitarian

“I don’t like conflict,” she admitted. “It terrifies me. I don’t want people upset with me.”

“And what happens when you encounter conflict?” asked the workshop facilitator.

“I shut down both physically and emotionally,” she replied. “I want to run away.”

I was in a management seminar, and the facilitator was talking about a concept she called “Moving Away From/Drawn Toward.” Initially, the conversation was about goal-setting but had evolved to include coping mechanisms and negative, dysfunctional behaviour patterns. 

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