What’s been on my mind lately?

Grief.

Why am I not grieving?

When Paul died I absolutely lost it. I laid in bed for days watching P.S. I love you bare handing a Rotisserie chicken. I would come home from work, exhausted from pretending to be okay, and I curled up in a blanket watching Supernatural. I cut myself off from the world, ignoring the phone to the point it destroyed my relationship I had just started right after he passed. I cried for hours, sometimes in screaming pain.

Now I feel nothing most days.

I lost the woman who was basically my mother for over half my life. She showed me love, and what it was like to have a mother figure. She was one of 2 women who took me in when I needed the love the most. Here was a life giver who tormente...

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