Hey Brian!
You crack me up man. I hope you don't expect letters as long as yours from me, I have a life to live, especially since I found a decent 'Gal pal,' to go on misadventures and burn things down with.

Im sure you were just joking, but I'll still take the time to say I wouldn't give up on dating if I were you. First of all, you're not exactly in what I imagine to be the most ideal of places to be picking up women that aren't focused on viewing life the way described in your letter; At least based on what I've heard of the hipster, liberal West Coast's mentalities towards Political correctness. There again too- If you do want to be alone, well then, go be alone, there's nothing wrong with that if it's something you can swing. I've been alone a long time and I was fine all that time, now that I think about it. So you are probably in the same

boat, especially if your single life military experience was at all similar to mine.

Anyway, I can't say I've ever mixed a Pepsi and Coke, but I love having the occasional Egg Cream when I stop into a candy shop. Can't say I know the 'why to' of its name, however. I just know there's not actually any egg in it. I also don't want to potentially ruin it by doing the research to discover its history. You know, maybe it's a Nazi drink or something.

Anyway, as to an officially bottled Roy Rogers, I'd at least try them if Coke and Pepsi put one out. The only reason there isn't one probably has something to do with the licensing of Roy's name. I bet if 'Cherry' was someone's copyrighted name, none of the brands would have a cherry flavor. 7up would have to call it 7up Antioxidant, or bring back

 'dnL.' From what I remember of the early nineties Crystal Pepsi was pretty good. I heard they were bringing it back, but thanks to having a girlfriend now, I'm not too keen on what exists outside, sports, work and home life. So I can't really speak much more about the goings on in the soda world anymore.
Sorry, but not sorry, man.

Regardless, I don't imagine the world is in dire need of an official Roy Rogers; probably no more than the RC, Big Cola and Big Red sofa flavors you mentioned.

Hey! In other news I went to a Ted Talk a couple  months back with my lady. Oh, then New York couple weekends later for my birthday. She surprised me by having my name and Happy Birthday projected on the Jumbotron. So your name was up their too, if you think about it.

Anyway, don't sweat the small stuff. Dates exist so you can find out the person you are interested in is a flaming feminist and would take all your stuff given the chance. So count yourself lucky she exposed herself already. She could have soaked you for a bunch more free dinners and eventually your estate if she was more subvert; assuming you paid for the dinner and have an estate, like the Psuedo-Gentleman you might be.

Anyway, I'm gonna tie things up. The girlfriend is calling. We have home made cookies to ice and a bird feeder to build with her.

Kidding!
Just have to fill the bird feeder.
(We built it last weekend at a Home Depot)

Adios!
-Brian

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CHANNILLO

Brian (e)'s Second Letter to Brian (w)
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Hey Brian!
You crack me up man. I hope you don't expect letters as long as yours from me, I have a life to live, especially since I found a decent 'Gal pal,' to go on misadventures and burn things down with.

Im sure you were just joking, but I'll still take the time to say I wouldn't give up on dating if I were you. First of all, you're not exactly in what I imagine to be the most ideal of places to be picking up women that aren't focused on viewing life the way described in your letter; At least based on what I've heard of the hipster, liberal West Coast's mentalities towards Political correctness. There again too- If you do want to be...

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