Hey Brian!
You crack me up man. I hope you don't expect letters as long as yours from me, I have a life to live, especially since I found a decent 'Gal pal,' to go on misadventures and burn things down with.

Im sure you were just joking, but I'll still take the time to say I wouldn't give up on dating if I were you. First of all, you're not exactly in what I imagine to be the most ideal of places to be picking up women that aren't focused on viewing life the way described in your letter; At least based on what I've heard of the hipster, liberal West Coast's mentalities towards Political correctness. There again too- If you do want to be...

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